I decided to blog today about my awesome boys. Yes, a brag blog! Who doesn't just love to hear stories about others' children...Right? Well, anyway, I just can't resist! Since we are snowed in and I can't go see them today, I hope this helps get me through the day.
I have written many "death bed" love letters to my boys...Yes, I am neurotic. Okay, so I may not have really been dying, but to me, I didn't want leave this world without them knowing how much I love them...So usually before any medical procedure that's what I do...I wright letters and cards even when I don't think I'm dying, they just might not be as mushy. They all know what to do if something would happen...they know what and where my arrangements are...what music I want...even what I want to wear...And they know my eyebrows better be plucked and nails done! Okay so that may seem a little crazy to some, but dealing with my mothers death and other close family members that avoided this plan of action has made me more obsessed with my end of life plan.
Alright, this is about the boys! One recent surreal occasion was a conversation I had with my 18 year old. When did it go from reading to him, listening to his woes to me confiding in him and he me on adult issues? I love this bond and mutual respect for our opinions, I enjoy sharing and getting feedback...but I blinked and this is where we are! I look at him and watch him and even though he is 18, he is still my little boy. As I tear up with pride and joy that this boy has brought me, I look forward to his future and our relationship steps to come.
Now to my 13 year old...Oh boy! My step-mom always thought he had this wise old man look and the way he carried himself...her little man...And up until his dad and I divorced, he was an absolute mamas boy! This kid wouldn't go to anyone other than his mama. I had to pull him out of pre-school because he was just mortified and miserable being away from me...so we did it at home. He is a thinker and sadly inherited my neurotic tendencies. I tried so hard to not let my kids see that side of me, but he picked up on it. I would always stay calm as can be in any tragedy and tell him "when you see mama worry, you can worry...otherwise, its okay." That did help at certain times...then he would always ask "are you worried mom?" Of course I would have to always say no even when I was. No he is a teen and gets quite the attitude and seems to be less confident than his brothers. He doesn't want his hair cut and that drives me batty. I dread taking him to get it cut because he gets such attitude...Now, yes, I should be MOM and say too bad, you are cutting it...but its easier to let him go than deal with him...yep, pick your battles. But he is a sweetie and when he isn't being a "teenager" he is the coolest ever!
Then there is my 11 year old. He would give you the shirt off his back, while he was slipping your ear buds in his pocket :D Such a sweetie boy with sticky fingers... He is getting better butt we used to have to pad him down before parent exchanges...Its funny now because hes growing out of it, but for awhile we were pretty frustrated! He has a heart valve issue that will require him to have surgery someday...and don't think he doesn't milk that...You remember Sanford and Sons from the late 70's? When the dad would grab his heart and say "Oh my heart, my heart" well, I chuckle because this little man will do the same thing...when he gets in trouble boy does he play that up! He has had a few episodes of real concern, so we do take him seriously for the vast majority of the time, but we know if there was an incident before the grabbing of his chest, he probably needs attention... He is so sporty too! And out of all my boys, he is the most athletic but has to be careful with his heart. I keep praying his scores stay the same and he won't have to go through surgery like his dad. Last two check ups have been good...Power of prayer!
Oh my baby boy! We call him the General! Yes, he is the baby and only nine, but he is a mamas boy! And that's okay! With four boys, I enjoy the mama boy years because soon he won't kissies or huggies or other mommy stuff. The General is so loved and has this charisma that attracts people to him. He smiles with his eyes. I always tell him he has "stars in his eyes". He will grin. When he was younger, he's wake up and say "Mommy, do I have stars in my eyes?" He always shares whatever he has and is so crazy about his big brothers. He can make friends with any animal... He does go insane over spiders though...I guess my crazy Arachnophobia has rubbed off! He promises he will always be my baby and never tell me he doesn't want my lovins. I love my General.
Well, just a little glimpse into my love for my boys. I have two step daughters that I am going to work on finding the good and writing about them too. Prayers for that relationship is much needed.